The Glass Bangle

Being a Woman

Of Monitors and Men !

The first thing that Hubby does on waking up in the morning is check his phone and then after the necessary ablutions it’s on to the ipad for catching up with the world  followed by a smooth transition to the laptop for work related stuff. What’s it with men and monitors ? They are blissfully happy to stare at screens the whole day  and it’s so frustrating to conduct conversations with them when they are romancing the screen . I’ve realised that I’ve started holding conversations with myself due to the lack of response from the opposing party !

We share a love of books and both of us are avid readers. Along comes  Kindle and its one more reason for him to gaze at a screen for hours.  Hubby is usually quite jovial and witty when conversing, but stick a screen in front of him and Zap, he’s replaced by an automaton. I have to admit that the world of machines is quite secular with the TV, iPad, computers and whatnot getting equal attention. A typical conversation in the morning would consist of long soliloquies on my part with an intermittent grunt from him  and the trick lay in deciphering what exactly that meant. Well, taking a leaf out of the story of mountains and Mahomet, one morning I grandly logged on to Facebook ( to digress a bit, I have felt for some time that facebook is the Bermuda Triangle in disguise! ) and proceeded to have a very satisfying chat with Hubby who incidentally was seated at the other end of the couch. However I want to have face to face conversations with him and I’ve come up with some more tactics.

Hubby hates the music I listen to and so while he’s engrossed in the latest shenanigans of Apple, I play my soulful music and that too quite loudly. Up comes the head and he first looks entreatingly at me but I’m made of sterner stuff and so a manic grin is all he gets. Then slowly the gadget in his hands is put on standby with reluctance and then very patiently he asks me why I want to listen to dirges in the morning. Phew ! now that I’ve got his attention, I skilfully manoeuvre ( at least I think I do ) the conversation to other topics of interest. Tactic No.2 is to read the newspaper while he’s engaged as usual. Very casually I poke him on the arm and read out a tidbit from the papers. Initially he manages with the grunt but when the frequency and intensity of pokes go up, up comes the head again. The success rate of this tactic unfortunately is not very high since Hubby usually ends up getting angry for being poked and prodded and disturbed and a fight in the morning is not my aim. I have various other weapons in my armoury which involves waving my hand in front of his face until he looks up, switching off the wifi connection, calling him on his phone which is usually kept in the other room for charging, but all are guaranteed to end in tears and bloodshed so only used in emergencies or when I’m bored 🙂

However, I must say that the kids get complete attention from him and the screens are forgotten temporarily when they are around. I definitely cannot change into a kid and so I’m thinking of painting my face onto a screen and sticking it in front of Hubby when I want to catch his attention 🙂


12 comments on “Of Monitors and Men !

  1. Dileep
    October 9, 2012

    Hi Anju, love your posts… Poor Avinash, must warn him about these dark plots and plans afoot…

    I’m not into gadgets myself but regularly drive Sarina mad by going upstairs to read. I keep telling her that men need to “escape” and “go into their caves sometimes” and even suggested that she read ‘Men are from Mars…’ for the funda on this, but she says then we must move into a nice cave with no upstairs !!! Sometime back she had a brainwave and followed me into the cave… we ended up having a baby… PLEASE DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME !!!

    And we are soon to move from our house and into a flat… the thought fills me with trepidation !!! Will the balcony do for a cave, I wonder…


    • The Glass Bangle
      October 10, 2012

      Thanx Dileep ! Moving into an apartment will be great for the kids since they’ll have lots of friends to play with. Don’t worry about your cave, I’ve realised that guys are capable of disappearing into another world even when they are physically before you . So cave or no cave you’ll get your own space 🙂


  2. Sreeja
    October 8, 2012

    I like


  3. Sujit Sumitran
    October 8, 2012

    Very relevant conversation Anju. Here are my 2 cents –

    Firstly, can you have a conversation around the following frame:
    1) On your need for some time for ‘togetherness’?
    2) On understanding what his perspective is about this?
    3) On why is it important for you? And, what’s the impact on you when you don’t get time for connecting with him.
    4) On how a time and place can be slotted that works for both of you and not just for one at the cost of the other?

    Lot’s of questions? Ta – Sujit


    • The Glass Bangle
      October 8, 2012

      Whoa ! Sujit , you’ve taken it to a whole new level. Actually this is not that critical an issue and hence I love to see the lighter side of it. Both Avinash and I wholly believe in what Kahlil Gibran has said, ” Let there be spaces in your togetherness “.
      Thanks a ton for stopping by 🙂


      • Sujit Sumitran
        October 8, 2012

        Hmmmm. I’m sorry I mis-read your post. My apologies. 🙂 Ta.


      • The Glass Bangle
        October 8, 2012

        No sweat ! Do keep dropping in . Great to hear your thoughts 🙂


  4. Madoqua
    October 5, 2012

    Perhaps the strategy is to become “very busy” yourself. When you are suddenly not there for long periods of time, the penny may drop that some effort needs to be put into “getting you back”.


    • The Glass Bangle
      October 5, 2012

      Good Thought Madoqua ! Blogging has already put me on this path, but I have a sneaking suspicion that he’s quite happy with the peace and quiet 🙂


  5. Sajai
    October 3, 2012

    hmmmm……a dangerously funny article which I never should share with Resmi. Great writing though!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


This entry was posted on October 3, 2012 by in Family, Home, Husband, life, women and tagged , , , .
%d bloggers like this: